Monday, February 27, 2012

What is a Girl to Do?

Statistically, young men and women are waiting longer to marry. The average age for a man to marry is 28, and the average age for a girl is 26. So what is a girl to do while she is single?

1. Do not sit around waiting. You typically complete your formal education between the ages of 18 and 22. Yahweh does not intend for us to sit around doing nothing for 8 or 10 years just wondering where our young man is. He intends for this to be a very productive preparation time in our lives. We are to learn how to serve our families, our congregations, and our community. This is also an excellent time to hone our homemaking skills such as sewing, cooking, cleaning, home decorating, handcrafts such as knitting and crochet, and so much more. This is also the time that we have the freedom to learn and study the Word of God. We can also have the freedom to go on mission trips, travel to see friends, etc.

2. Be a Sister. We are to be sisters in all purity to our brothers. Yes, one of those brothers will probably turn out to be our husband at some point; however, we do not know who that is! We need to treat each young man as another woman’s husband and our friend only. We can encourage them, listen to them, and serve them, but we do not need to chase them. Chasing guys will chase the good guys away leaving only the guys without good standards. Besides, you do not want to chase the guy and “win” them. That is the guy’s job!

3. Do Not Dwell on Young Men. No, it is not a sin to notice young men. That is totally normal for us as young ladies to notice young men especially when they are kind and willing to serve; however, we do not need to dwell on them. We especially should not be dwelling on certain young men and dreaming of what our life would be like if we were to marry them.

4. Yet Notice the Positive. Rather, we should take note of what makes us notice the young men that draw our attention. Is it because he willingly served His mom? That is a positive! Take note of what draws you to various young men and begin a list of qualities you are looking for in a future husband. Learn from your brothers.

5. And notice the Negative. Negatives are helpful. Notice what turns you off from a young man. Is he flirty? If he is, then realize he’ll flirt with all the girls even when you are married. I do not know about you, but that is a quality, I definitely do not want. So I will put that on my list as something I do not want. I’ll also look at the opposite which is faithfulness and put that on my list. I want a husband who is faithful to God first then me second only to God. Again, learn from your brothers.

6. Pray. Prayer is very crucial during this time in your life. Pray that Yahweh will develop you into the Godly young woman that He wants you to be, and pray for the same in your future husband. I really enjoyed and learned a lot from the book Praying for Your Future Husband which is on this exact topic allowing God through prayer to mold you and your future spouse. And do not hesitate to pray for him in specific ways as you feel led such as health, spiritual life, etc.

7. Be under authority. Another key part is to be under the authorities in your life. They are there for your protection. They have lived much longer than you and learned many things that you and I have both yet to learn, so they can provide guidance and insights that we often miss due to “lack of experience” in this area. They can also help prevent us from wearing “rose-colored glasses” resulting in a distorted view. So keep talking to your parents, listen to them, and be willing to submit to their guidance. It will save you much heartache.

In the end, Yahweh has a beautiful life story painted for each of us whether or not it includes a special young man. Keep living that and stay in His will.

1 comment:

  1. Have you ever read "Preparing to be a Help Meet" by Debbi Pearl??? You would love it! In fact, you are practically quoting it~

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